Building resilience and confidence in children

PARENTING & TEACHING TIPS - BUILDING RESILIENCE

WHAT PARENTS CAN DO:

ENCOURAGING EMPATHY

  • Talk about how others may be feeling
  • Model how we put ourselves in other people’s shoes

DEVELOPING FRIENDSHIPS

  • Arrange play dates
  • Discuss the rules of friendship and fair play
  • Praise your child, specifically, for positive social behaviour

SETTING REALISTIC EXPECTATIONS

  • Discuss events beforehand
  • Anticipate a range of possible outcomes
  • Be realistic in what YOU expect of your child

COPING WITH FAILURE

  • Discuss the possibility beforehand
  • Plan a range of possible solutions or reactions
  • Model how we can learn from our mistakes

TRYING NEW EXPERIENCES

  • Model a willingness to do the same yourself
  • Provide non-threatening and less public opportunities to try things
  • Allow your child to observe first, to alleviate fears or anxiety

DEVELOPING 'ISLANDS OF COMPETENCE'

  • Involve children, initially, in a variety of activities
  • Find one or two in which your child is interested and competent

IDENTIFYING STRENGTHS

  • Openly praise them
  • Remind them of their strengths
  • Build on their strengths

HELPING OTHERS

  • Takes the focus off themselves
  • Gives them a sense of purpose and achievement

REPLACING 'NEGATIVE SELF TALK'

  • Firstly, acknowledge the concerns, worries or fears
  • Identify and point out ‘negative’ talk or thoughts
  • Help your child re-word their thoughts more realistically

ENCOURAGING POSITIVE THINKING

  • Model positive, realistic and hopeful thinking yourself
  • Praise your child when you hear a positive comment

FEELING CONNECTED

  • Foster links with friends, neighbours, older and younger people
  • Facilitate interactions with others

COMMUNICATION SKILLS

  • Encourage your child to answer phones, order meals etc.
  • “NAME” aggressive or passive communication
  • Help your child re-word inappropriate communications

READING BODY LANGUAGE

  • Comment regularly on body language or facial expressions in your child and others

COPING WITH COMPETITION

  • Play a variety of games with your child
  • Don’t always let them win
  • Praise good sportsmanship
  • Play games where winning is not the focus of the game
  • Encourage co-operative play and team games

DEVELOPING SELF-ESTEEM

  • Encourage independence
  • Encourage pride in one’s self and one’s achievements
  • Expose your child to situations in which you know they will experience success

MAKING CHOICES

  • Give your child opportunities to make choices
  • Talk through important decisions
  • Allow your child to see and experience the results of his choices

COPING WITH DISAPPOINTMENTS

  • Accept that there are some things we can not change
  • Look for alternatives
  • Encourage problem solving

ENCOURAGING A SENSE OF HUMOR

  • Laugh together
  • Defuse tension with laughter

LOOKING FOR GOOD IN OTHERS, YOURSELF AND THE FUTURE

  • Speak positively about yourself, your child, their school, the future
  • Set goals and remain hopeful

RELAXATION - COPING WITH WORRIES

  • Make some quiet time in everyone’s day
  • Notice when things seem to be building up around your child
  • Suggest a little time out – reading, listening to music, talking
  • Discuss the idea of consciously slowing down
  • Focus on relaxation techniques – breathing, visualising, muscle relaxing

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MOTIVATIONAL POSTERS - Resilience